i dreamt of hsiao yan this afternoon when i was napping !
MAN .,
it's awesome , cause i rmb every single part of the dream like super real ..
and , i could control everything in the dream .
in my dream it happen like i met her along my house near by cc .
where she always seat around staring at some cool guys playing bball ..
and , in my dream i was on my way to cgm ..
so i walk passed the cc , i couldn't believe what i see , and shouted her most funny nick name.
to see her reaction ..
and she yelled back .. si liu liu !
i was super happy and went to embrace her .
OMG . i could still remember her perfume .. the one i gave her on her birthday .
super nice . and i ask ..her ..
eh , zha bor .. not bad uh , still wearing this perfume i gave you . hmmm , Good taste uh !
then she replied .. of cause lah , my favourite from my dearest BFF leh ..
i was so touched and ask her how was she ..
and the first thing i asked her was ..
did you met God ?
or like , did you enter hell or something ?
she laughed and said .. she got no idea ..
but she asked me not to ask about all these . so i changed topic and ..
said that i'm going to cgm ..
so she say : eh .., pei me eat lunch then go leh ..
i was like , huh ? dead ppl eat lunch too ?
i was like ... hahahaha .
we went to eat at ramen 10 .
i ask her whether she read my blog or check her friendster ..
she say she did leh !
Lol . and say what she read my post super xin tong i kennah bully by karen ..
O.O amazed .
so we chatted . and i cried and say i super miss her alot alot .
and she sayang my head and said ..
其实我也不想离开你们的。。
我也很像回到过去。。 和你们开心平凡的日子。。
我以前真得太傻了。。
很后悔当时作的决定。。。


then i kept crying ...
but at the same time encouraging her to not think so much ..
cause she'll remain alive in my heart always .
she told me she enter into her parents dreams too .
but they kept crying and she left ..
she even asked me to really take care of her parents and etc .
i promised her i will and she gave me a smile .
and told me that she's very happy for me .. and someone .
quite surprised she knew about it .. kekes.
she then showed me my birthday card she prepared for me . { it's PINK! }
it was super nice .. and there was a 2 page long messaged inside for me ..
awwwwwwwwww , how i wish i could take the card along with me when i wake up .
and i say , zhabor . i don't feel like waking up sia ..
then she pushed me to a light and say it's time for you to go back .
i woke up falling out of my bed in tears .



my butt still aches now .
damn hsiao yan .





Hsiao Yan is so gone gone gone .
and miss her her her .
my best friend ever .
standing before the black and white photo of her ..
reading all her news articles ..
assuring the face is hsiao yan ..
again and again ..
i admit , i can't accept it until now ..



but she's gone forever ... ):
so i'll just keep her in my prayers ~






mou ren mou ren mou ren .
<3