i miss Lee Xue lian !





Omg .
i ate wrong food yesterday . and chua sai like hell this morning .
kept thinking did i drink milk .
wahaha . mdm waheeda's joke still flowing in my mind man ..
its says ...


" don't suck on women's nipples cause like those breast feedings can have the influence from china "

wahahaha . or some way another . i find damn funny .
i did not drink milk lei .
i ate cheeze ?
eh , not counted what . anyways , i trust my school canteen aunties . Lol
i curse those dirty food lah ..
jack fruit banna skin .
was drunk drunk drunk the other night ..
7 bottles .... ):
then today can't go school because i had jelly legs and super pain headaches ..
mommy's chinese pill saved the pain for a lil while then i fell asleep .
studied and revised science and math .
finished doing my F&N pass year papers from 2000-2007 .
hands buay ta han ..
talked to sha yesterday regards a lil bit of my life and future .
my current mood is super complicated .
cause the environment and condition i'm facing now sucks to the core .
and i'm still lifting my face up to God .
no . i will not allow this dying spirit grow inside me .
i will not think of any sucides .
cause i am precious in God's eyes .
and my leaders and friends love me .




i say it by faith i know they love me alot alot .
cause only in church , loves grows so strong .



had a small misunderstanding with my sweetie edna which i wanna clear my lungs out here .
1 ) the message we pass don't have your bad names or what ever .
It's merely like you think too much , etc .
there's some stuffs that are meant to be private between us .
like i have my secrets with you that mel can't know right ?
but it's also not mel's gossips what .
so .. can you just trust me more ?
don't keep have the thinking like the whole world is treating you bad and like ..
you've so many things to gossip about you lah ..
you've changed alot from past . so why not move on for the better ?
you're Edna now , not any peice from your past .
So ,ah lian mind sets shouldn't be on your mind .






2 ) The relationship you have with God is private .
it does not drags me or anyone in it .
every time you worship him or pray to him it's private isn't it ?
so why must the blame be me when you don't sense the love of God anymore .
why not ask for more of his presence and seek him more ?
by coming to church more ..
spend more time with the cg and..
stop giving excuses ?
hmmm , i say theres a relationship with God when you firstly make a commitment to it .
but , you can't even make the least step out and you wanna blame on others ?
simply by waking up earlier than your usuals like 11 and i meet you at your place .
very hard meh ?
then if you shake off from all these from God and you wanna be with your bf..
i have nothing to say . (:
p.s / stop blaming God also . (;

so to conclude ..
if you really wanna backslide , just because of me ..
i can say you're too silly to make this decision .
and one thing it's 100% true is , God loves you more than anyone .
so up to you (:




hmmms , jiayou for your Nlvls first kay .
still love you as my sweetie lah ..
don't doubt me anymore can ?
* hugs * call me asap when you read this.







okay okay ..
my tummy aches are like coming back ..
needa go eat meds already .
bye...



* thanks baby for the cheerings .
ibah ibah ibah !! :D *