long awaited guys !
I'm finally blogging again .
actually wanted to wait for my comp to recover again then post all my pictures..
and give you all a nice post .
but it's still sick .
I'm now using my sis laptop .
i want to blog again cause i couldn't keep it anymore .
seriously , i cant stand the people around me anymore .
and , i can't stand people around me being so selfish .
i really cant stand it anymore .
i these few days because of this , i got flu .
i just hate those type of people .





but anyway .
there's someone dear in my heart broke my heart like hell yesterday night .
damn that feeling ..
people doubting you .
damn , i tell you .
i totally don't know what to say anymore ..
all i can say is , i should stay away from all these already .
maybe sometime i joke too much .
people say that I'm too noisy .
and today . i kept quiet , they say that I'm " dao " , " emo " or whatever that can discribe coolness .
some even say that I'm angry !

i just can't accept the things happening around me .
everything is coming up to me at one go .
friends .
sisters .
brothers .man i had enough .
and for whoever that have hurt me in heart .
you know who you are .
seriously , for whatever you've said or done , i don't mind at all .
and from today onwards I'm not going to be like before anymore .
I'm going to protect myself .



Love is such a difficult thing .
Hate is such a tiring thing .

i was born to meet the darkest life .
i was born to meet the saddest broken family .
i use to hate my mother .
i use to hate my own blood father for 5 years .
i use to hate almost everyone even my own .
i was being thrown away like a rubbish .
i was being betrayed by friends like a toy .
i was a girl who cried wolf and her mom never believe her again .
i was a girl who was lost in her life .
i use believe that no one can be ever trueful .
i never believe in any man .
i never believe in true love .
i can't love / accept myself .
i was a fool .
a part of me was dead .
i didn't know who i am .





i just entered the glorious heaven .
i ment my broken family .
i'm honouring and loving my mother .
i see my father again , forgive and accepted him .
i'm learning how to love like Him .
i'm no longer neglected . He showers me with His love every single day .
I stepped out and believe in courage once again to love .
I repented and i don't wanna lie anymore . my mom now listen to me (:
I found my way of life in His leading . I never lose my way again .
In Him i see the truth and care .
He's the man whom i really love and trust now (:
I now believe in eternal love .
I take care of myself , i never commit suicide or smoke anymore .
she is now a women who carries her cross with faith wherever she goes .
she was transformed and now living with happiness .
she found her destiny in her live .




I can no longer hear this from other people's mouth ..
" she is such a disappointment .
leave her alone . "

everything credits to her almighty God .
I'm not doing this for anyone else .
but you alone lord .
i believe in you .



i don't wanna miss a single thing .