man .
super tired .
talk with a pi gu ren until 4 ++ ?
Lol , was super hungry then .
decided to starve myself until this morning when i wake up .
then , mommy didn't prepare any food .
so decided to blog , and starve till later then catch a breadtalk and amk hub .
i'm super hungry lahs .
I'm so sorry guys for not eating for the past few days .
please understand I'm not starving myself cause i want to slim down hors .
i just don't have much appetite .
and , after so many things happen , i just couldn't have much good mood to eat .
I felt so sorry .
really .
everyday i'm praying to God .
i promise i wont have the thought of turning back time anymore .
i dont want to turn back time anymore .
whatever that i lost , i will not chase after them anymore.
i wont ...
I'm so sorry for being a hypocrite .
i don't feel any normal at all these days .
the feeling of missing someone you can no longer see anymore really hurts .
it's so cruel , that even 60 ribenas will not make me any happy .
obviously , no one would bring me so many ribena to cheer me up .
cause my friends are nice they wont want to see me in NKF 3 days later .
i couldn't stop myself from missing him every single night when i lay myself to sleep .
speaking with till late nights , listening to his life and his whispering .
Every morning waking up without his morning calls .
every prayers that he pray and fast.
his gentle smile and lil faith that always give me strength .
the promises that shouldn't be broken .
i stayed awake throughout these nights .
browsing every messages that he sent me saved inside my phone .
listening to the music that he likes ...
my heart aches ..
i know this is really funny right ?
i always thought tat emo people are ugly .
and i hope I'm not behaving like one now .
well , i made this decision to end it for God .
people say im silly , scold me that im stupid .
some even say that im cheating his feelings .
OR WHATEVER LAH KAYS .
i wont even care much .
cause whatever im doing is for God only .
and again .
everything is enough with him in my life (:




i hope i havent change in anyways .
sometimes i really rather staying brave and just be myself .
cause only God understands ...